20-NYE-11: "Good-bye Grandpa!"

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I only posted 16 times on this blog in 2010 and that's a shame. My goal is to write more this year. I started a new book December 31st and have already written 60 pages in word, single spaced mind you. So I'm focused. Hopefully by summer I'll have it and the sequel completed and I can use my free time from work to see about getting that thing published. So to keep in the spirit of writing, I'm going to get back into blogging.

NEW YEARS EVE was the BEST night of my life ALL Winter! OMG! I went out with 3 of my sorors to the Suite lounge in Charlotte. After I got over the shock of paying $50 to get into the club, we got dolled up and hit the bar and the dance floor. I danced with so many guys of so many races and it was a SPECTACULAR experience. I even had this dude buy me a drink and offer to buy more. But when I had his drink, that was #4 for me and I was stopping. Last time I got drunk was WCU homecoming in October and I was ridiculous. I didn't want to be ridiculous out in public on New Year's Eve. But anyway, this guy buys me a drink and then lets me keep the change from the drink. $4.00. Hey that's a meal from Wendy's. So after that, I decided to flirt a little bit. He deserved it for adding to my alcohol intake and my wallet. He was really cute too, which was an added bonus and had beautiful straight teeth. But as the night progressed and our flirting, a few warning signs were thrown up and then the bomb went off and I had to cut him off.

1. he came to the lounge alone
2. he spent most of his time at the bar
3. when he did wander away from the bar he was kind of stalkerish looking at women
4. he got way too fresh when he was dancing with me ( I won't elaborate)
5. dude got way too drunk
and finally 6. he got all defensive when I asked him how old he was

"Why do you want to know how old I am?" I thought it was a logical question. I mean I saw potential in giving him my number and getting to know him outside of the club. Aside from the warning signs he was really a nice guy. Well how old was this attractive big spender? "I'm 36," was his reply to my question.

WHAT?! 36. Dude, that means you are technically old enough to be my father if you impregnated my mom when you were 14. EEEWWWWWWW.

Good-bye grand-pa. Dude was cut off!

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Computer Obscenities

F*%#ing computer I just want to throw it off my balcony. It's been f*%#ing up and glitches and deleting things as I'm typing and if it keeps this s&@t up I'm just gonna go buy a new one. I don't have time for these tech issues. I just had the thing reformatted in the summer by the Geek Squad so it should be working like it's brand new. I no longer download music, I have a great spyware program and I'm careful about the pages I get on the internet. What is the deal? I hate this!

Non-Negotiables

I spent some good quality time with myself this weekend watching some romantic comedies, Leap Year, Dear John & The Back-Up Plan, and one very touching movie, For Colored Girls, and it has put my mind into a state of contemplation. Every time I go home my mom brings up the subject of just when am I going to start dating. I keep having recurring dreams where I'm in a relationship. A good friend of mine visited with me this weekend and asked if I ever got lonely living by myself. So I got to thinking. It's been oh, about 6 months since the devastating break-up and I'm proud to say that my heart is completely healed (and has been for many months now) so I believe I'm ready to date. In fact there's nothing I want more than to get back out there! Only problem is, I don't exactly know a lot of people here in town, and I don't exactly have a lot of free time during the week to go explore. When and where on Earth am I going to meet guys that will check off on my list of "non-negotiables"?What are those non-negotiables one might ask. Well, it's a list of qualities I pray to God to send me in the next man that I date. They are:

1. Degree or taking steps toward higher education.
2. Lives on his own and has his own set of wheels.
3. Christian
4. Good morals and family values
5. Non smoker
6. Wants a commitement

A list of 6 things, a professional matchmaker might say it's a little outrageous  but I don't think it's too bad. I mean here is my breakdown of why I've listed these as my top 6.

1. I have a degree, and I want to be equally matched intellectually with a partner and these days its hard to get a decent job without a degree. I understand college isn't for everyone, but please, do something to try to better yourself instead of sitting around playing X-Box all day or working part-time as a delivery driver. Have some goals, have some aspirations. I do. And I'm making strides to achieve them.
2. I live on my own and have my own car, so I expect that in a partner. How can we possibly get to know one another if we have to schedule "us time" around roomates, siblings or parents. Also, I'm old-fashioned and I prefer to be driven around on a couple of dates, I don't want to be the one whose always picking up the other person.
3. I am a Christian and I am making steps to get closer in my walk with God and get stronger in my Faith. The Bible teaches that you shouldn't be unequally yoked with a partner, so I need to date a Christian, not a non-believer. Otherwise they could hold me back.
4. I have morals, strong ones, and I place a lot of emphasis on family. You can learn a lot about a person by how they interact with their family. I want these to be positive.
5. OMG I ABSOLUTELY HATE SMOKING! Why partake in an activity that is taking minutes off your life each time you take a drag. Not to mention the horrible smell that gets into and onto everything. I can't be with a smoker. It is a deal breaker. No if, ands or buts.
6. Finally, I want a guy who wants to commit, not just casually date. I'm not that type of dater. I like to be in relationships and give my all to that one special someone. I eventually want to get married and have kids. I need to date someone who is on the same page.


So there is my list of non-negotiables. I don't think it's too drastic. Now I just have to figure out how  to meet a person who fulfills all my criteria. And that my friends is easier said than done.

Searching For A Church

I moved out on my own almost a month ago, and three Sunday's have gone by and I've sat on my couch in my PJs and watched cartoons instead of getting dolled up and heading out to a morning Church service. My parents have asked me a few times have I found a church and I replied to them that I was waiting to get settled into living on my own before I go out there and find a church family, which is true. So this morning I woke up super early and as I was flipping through the channels trying to find a marathon of Avatar, I came across a local church service airing on TV. I sat and watched. And then I turned on my computer and started researching the church. I even went as far to email the pastor and ask him some very poignant questions. 

Is it wrong and lazy of me to not be out there visiting these churches in person, but rather taking a more reserved approach and researching them on the Internet and emailing the pastors and asking them about the messages they teach, doctrines and their beliefs, as well as the racial and age percentage breakdowns of their congregations. I mean, I'm the type of person who doesn't like to waste my precious time and precious gas, going to different churches that don't fulfill my criteria.

Having been raised as a pastors child I know the Truth about God's Word, and I can't just go plop my rump down in any pew and listen to just anybody with a ministry ordainment preach what they believe to be the "Truth". I want to be in a God-centered, supportive family environment that doesn't sugar coat heaven and hell, and repenting for sins, and consequences of not living a Godly lifestyle. I want to be somewhere that we uplift me spiritually while also challenging me in my Walk with Christ. I want to be somewhere that simply is honest and teaches the Truth. While also not being full of only one race, and having a lot of old people. Tough criteria I know. But I want a church that has people that look like me, and different from me, and are near to me in age, while also older and younger than me. This world isn't comprised on only old people, or only black people, or only married people. It is a diverse world, and I want to become a member in a diverse church family. 

What are your thoughts? It's a lot to request, but I will not give in. I will be successful in my endeavors to find a new church to call home. 

The Unspoken Rule

I was having dinner last night with two of my sorors and we got onto the subject of the single life and dating. One was telling me some personal information about a recent turn of events in her life and it caused me to ask her this question, "Why is it that we, as females, have to follow that unspoken rule that guys that our friends have dated/talked to/messed around with in the past are unavailable and off limits to anyone in our circle of friends even, though that person is done with them?" Then one of my sorors brought up a valid point. What if that person was meant to enter our lives through you. Just because you two didn't work out, doesn't mean that this guy isn't the right one for me. Because if you think about it, sometimes, we would've never met some of the people we associate with if it hadn't been through a mutual friend. So my soror and I sat and debated this question: "Should I really follow that rule and leave him alone just because you're my friend and you had him first out of "respect"? Or do I go for it, and see where the relationship could potentially go and risk having you be mad at me and ruining our friendship?"

How complicating being a woman is. I want to task ladies with this. Don't fight over guys. DON'T, DON'T, DON'T!! If your friend wants to date your ex, or simply get to know him, and has been totally up front about it and has nothing to hide and is not trying to get back at you in any capacity, then let her. And in the event that their relationship doesn't work out, don't be catty and say "I told you so". Just say, well we all make mistakes. You were my friend first and we will continue being friends because I trust and love you, and move on.

Just food for thought. 

Moving On Up

It's been forever since I've written and its all due to the fact that life has been superbly busy for me this last month.

For starters...I've got a job; I'll be teaching 2nd grade at a wonderful school in Shelby. They hired me after my preliminary interview. And I know it was God looking out for me when the principal called and woke up up at 7:27am the day after my interview telling me how impressed she was with me, because originally she told me that the openings were in K and either 3rd/4th grade. So I accept the job and she surprises me and says I'll be in 2nd grade my favorite grade. My school also has some nice perks...SMARTboard, my own personal laptop, and ELMO, a HUGE classroom, and an online office supply thingy so I don't have to come out of pocket for expenses. Add that on to the fact that the teacher who I'm replacing left all her posters and bulletin board sets for me to use so I really don't have to buy ANYTHING. This is another reminder of what listening to God will do for your life. I prayed to him and trusted him that he would help me get the perfect job in the perfect grade and all of that has come to fruition.

I got a surprise today as well from dear old mom and dad. We went back to Gastonia to check out two more apartment complexes. Last time we went down there was about 3 weeks ago and I was deciding between two really nice properties. Well after careful consideration I knew which one I wanted but knew I couldn't move until September after I get my first TEACHER paycheck (:D), but dad out of the blue says he wants to go look at the property I had decided on moving to again. We do so, the property manager tells me that they only have a few units left, and the next thing I know, I'm filling out an application and dad is paying for my app fee and my security deposit. So now my apartment is officially mine and it wont get sold before I can move in. I'm in shock. Everything in my life is falling together right now and I feel so blessed. 

But aside from all of this serious stuff going on in my life, I spent a wonderful week in New Jersey and Maryland visiting two of my really good friends. My bff in NJ moved away when we were in 10th grade and were had met in 6th grade and were practically joined at the him. My homie in MD is my bestie guy friend who I met at camp. Both of them have been wanting to see me and I spent 4 days with both of them. I did a crazy thing and rented a car to drive 10hrs from NC to NJ, 6hrs from NJ to MD, and then 7 hrs from MD to home again. It was wild and absolutely crazy but I feel accomplished. It feels good navigating the road and being alone and in charge of my life. Road tripping is FUN! 

1st Job Interview

So, it finally happened. After all the resumes I've been sending out among like 6 different school systems I FINALLY got a call do to an interview at a school in Shelby. I was super stoked but just a smidge nervous. But after lots of prayer, preparation and getting some advice from a bestie I headed down there ready to wow them. And I must say that I did. I walked out of there with such huge confidence that I beasted that interview and they loved me!! Now it's all just a waiting game to see if I get a call back for a follow up interview. The school secretary was so kind as to let me know that they had interview over 40 people for the 1 5th grade position. That's crazy! So with me being interviewer number 46 I just hope that they hadn't found what they were looking for yet with candidates 1-45 and hopefully they see what they want in a teacher out of me.

But while I'm waiting I'm still going to be applying for jobs elsewhere. Catawba County finally posted its openings, to which there's only 3, 2 4th grades and a 1 5th, so I'm hoping God blesses me and I find some favor and can snag a job before the 2nd week in July. That is my prayer. That way I can start preparing for what I'll need.

Yoga

Fitness update!

I've discovered that I have Fit TV. I found this program called Namaste Yoga and every time it comes on I work out alongside the girls on TV or I DVR it so I can do it when I'm off work. I can feel it working my muscles. I looked in the mirror today and saw that my upper abs were beginning to show through underneath my stomach fat lol. And that was without me flexing anything. I felt pretty accomplished.

I also did this amazing cardio workout on Fit TV. Inspired by Bollywood Dance. Man, let me tell you was I ever sweating. But it felt so good to get my heart rate up. My goal is to workout everyday along to a program on Fit TV, whether its cardio, yoga or pilates. I can keep up with the TV for 30 minutes. Especially now that I'm starting to see results.

I put on a pair of jeans the other day and I didn't have to jump into them. They slid up a little easier. I haven't weighed myself officially, but I count that as progress.

There's also this gym downtown that I took a tour of. Has a yoga class on Mondays and a Zumba class on Saturdays that I'm interested in. It's a pretty cheap monthly membership of $39. Now I just have to gather the courage of going to a gym at regular intervals and working out by myself. 

My fitness goal for August, the start of a new school year where I will Lord willing be living and teaching in Winston-Salem, to have dropped a pants size. My pants size isn't that high as it is, but I want my toned, flexible body back. Not to mention I want to speed up my metabolism. For someone who loves to eat as much as I do. Physical exercise needs to be a regular component in my life.

Power Outage

I haven't written in a while and I was reminded of that today when I got a phone call from one of my good friends who said she enjoyed reading this. It helped her keep up with the news in my life since we were so far apart. That gives me new resolve to write.

So I was inspired today for a new piece of fiction. The power went out today because of a thunderstorm. It happens pretty frequently and generally comes back on again within a half hour. Today's outage time was about 2 hours. But what surprised me is that almost all of Newton's power was out. No grocery store, not CVS, no stoplights, no AC in the house. The power was out. But what surprised me during all of this was having to drive through a major 4 way intersection and people actually stopped, even though they might have had the right of way to let a few cars pass so that people who are not aggressive drivers could get to their destination. I was amazed. There still are kind people in this world.

Having the power out took me back to memories of summer camp last year. It was hot. There were no lights, no fans blowing and no AC. There were no sounds of TV commercials or gunshots on video games. It was quiet. Rather serene. It made me stop and think about live back in "olden" times when there was no electricity and plumbing. They survived it everyday while after 5 minutes of no AC and fan, I was complaining. It gave me inspiration to write a story about a the world 100s of years from now suffering from a statewide power outage. Who would survive and who wouldn't? What dirty traits would being without the usual comforts of life bring out of people. It's an interesting thought and we'll see how it goes. I'll have to log it into my idea book.

Throb, throb, throb

So I've been subbing for the last 5 days straight and I still have another 8 to go till the school year is over, plus I'm working part time at HDD in the evenings 3-4 nights a week. My schedule is super jam packed and I think my body is getting a little exhausted. Who would've thought that I would get so unaccustomed to going to waking up early and going to teach every morning since I ended my student teaching about a month ago. I've had a pesky lil cough that's trying to take root in my body and an intense headache for a solid two days! Oh I'm miserable. What's worse than being sick, is being sick and having to teach. I just want to curl up into a ball and sleep. Too bad sleep doesn't even come easily for me these days. I lay in bed tossing and turning for an hour and then I sleep so light it's like I'm in a state of semi-consciousness. And I'm so tired that when I do have a moment of down time I just plop down on the couch or in front of my computer when I need to be on the Wii working out or taking a walk through the neighborhood. I'm so slack these days and it's ridiculous. Can it be June 11th yet? Then summer vacation really begins...